I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Randomize
