Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Randomize
