I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Randomize
