Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
