Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
