where am i from again
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
Randomize
