He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Randomize
