then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
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