All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Randomize