I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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