"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
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