i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
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