Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Randomize
