no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Randomize
