I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
My underwear smells like fireworks.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
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