So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
