I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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