Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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