She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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