it wasn't lemon gatorade
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Randomize
