im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
