Sry I called you an 8
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Randomize
