And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
The iPhone is ruining my ability to sex message. My 5-year-old cousin just picked up my phone at my grandmas birthday party and read "I wanna stand you up and fuck you from behind" to my entire extended family bc of popped up on my screen
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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