Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.

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  (616): He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it. http://tfl.nu/cs3e
  Replies (2) Good night (866) Bad night (533)
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least

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  (804): I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least http://tfl.nu/2p1t
  Replies (10) Good night (1602) Bad night (588)
• Favorite

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.

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  (604): I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey. http://tfl.nu/1r0k
  Replies (27) Good night (11573) Bad night (901)
• Favorite

  (587): View more from Alberta

  She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra

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  (587): She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra http://tfl.nu/6lbp
  Replies (8) Good night (3043) Bad night (932)
• Favorite

  (256): View more from Alabama

  So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.

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  (256): So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen. http://tfl.nu/ty3k
  Replies (3) Good night (2513) Bad night (646)
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.

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  (803): I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me. http://tfl.nu/ijqd
  Replies (14) Good night (2900) Bad night (1160)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?

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  (317): Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night? http://tfl.nu/o2wm
  Replies (8) Good night (1623) Bad night (571)
• Favorite

  (707): View more from California

  I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots

  (1-707): View more from California

  You did like 8

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  (707): I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots (1-707): You did like 8 http://tfl.nu/2yf9
  Replies (6) Good night (2762) Bad night (615)
• Favorite

  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?

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  (918): It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar? http://tfl.nu/u4v8
  Replies (5) Good night (668) Bad night (1360)
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later

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  (708): If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later http://tfl.nu/o4md
  Replies (2) Good night (394) Bad night (853)
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.

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  (207): I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone. http://tfl.nu/cis8
  Replies (3) Good night (1246) Bad night (432)
• Favorite

  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.

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  (918): He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough. http://tfl.nu/jcxc
  Replies (1) Good night (696) Bad night (529)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched

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  (201): All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched http://tfl.nu/r5ws
  Replies (11) Good night (2739) Bad night (538)
• Favorite

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break

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  (704): Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break http://tfl.nu/3onf
  Replies (1) Good night (270) Bad night (660)
• Favorite

  (229): View more from Georgia

  I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist

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  (229): I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist http://tfl.nu/lub5
  Replies (0) Good night (442) Bad night (157)

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