But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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