so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Randomize
