He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize
