the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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