I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
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