Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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