My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Sorry about my life...
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
Randomize
