it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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