Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
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