the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
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