But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
