so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
i think im in europe. pls send help
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Randomize
