why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
