plz talk dirty to me
Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
