worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
