There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
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