she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
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