Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I have aggressive nipples.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Randomize
