now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Randomize
