Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize