It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
