I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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