I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
That was before I lit my hair on fire
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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