Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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