I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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