Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
