i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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