it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
